my boss sent me inappropriate text messages

This often makes it far more difficult to proceed with their claim. For more up-to-date information, sign up for our So might as well shorten the time period of feeling lousy. They were working from home more than she liked. How hard would it have been for her to say Hey, Alice I know I mentioned flexible working, but I should have been clearer that I actually meant people could come in later occasionally if they needed to, not every day. Nonetheless, I worked there for 2 more years and never breathed a word to anyone, even when the presidents sweet wife called multiple times a day and I had to field her calls. *In Canada, trademark(s) of the International Association of Better Business Bureaus, used under License. Why would you do 9 to 5 without being asked directly by boss to do so? Stay safe by reading the BBBs tips on how to spot fake text messages and how to avoid impostor scams. The airline suffered "an awfully difficult week. To be honest, I kind of love that I know I will almost never be scheduled for a meeting before noon, because almost any meeting Im in will also include my west coast colleagues, and nobody wants to be the dick who made the west coast team members be awake and functional enough to attend a meeting at 7am unless there was literally no other option. Ask Culture. I routinely send her emails at the end of my workday (I have to send constant status reports because we have a time-sensitive project due in a few weeks). By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. He says that similar fraud schemes are becoming increasingly popular, including different . To pay the rent? an acquaintance I recommended proselytized to all my clients (with singing), employee lied about his mom dying, coworker is a magpie, and more, my new employee is the parent of my childs bully, how to ask for a raise (because you need to), our remote employees were excluded from our company appreciation day, people keep asking why I wear pantyhose, career coach wants me to use someone elses job title, and more, the faked heart attack, the very smart dog, and other (amazing) stories of pettiness at work. 16 y/o daughter worked a first shift and is being offered a free meal as payment. Supervisor Sending Inappropriate Texts or Pictures? They may claim to be stuck in a meeting. He switched hotels on a whim at the last minute and couldnt do it himself? We knew she was out of her element, and those interactions proved it. This is something a pathologically conflict-averse person who is not sure of herself as a manager would do. Inside, it was a lengthy trashing of my friend. I mean, at least youre better than Diane. Hint: her department had total turnover about every year. These days, a swipe of a finger is all thats necessary to open an unsolicited inappropriate message on our phones and other digital devices. "Gift cards are for gifts, not for payments," the FTC writes. Don't say I didn't try! Chinas already won the working 24/7 production output of any country, and Germanys just as productive as USA and has a standard 35 work week. Shouldnt she be clocked out by now? It was 1 minute past my shift. I accidentally found a spreadsheet once in my old companies Sharepoint that detailed who they thought was on the promotion track and who they thought were just OK and would not be considered. Did I get that totally wrong?), Of course, you dont have a time machine so that doesnt help you now. Small business owners have to wear a lot of hats, and effective management isnt likely the skill they started a business on. The only thing I could think after reading this was that at least it was accidental. Put yourself in that mindset and I think youll feel far more empowered to deal with the situation. This thing of X is okay then three months later X is not okay drives me nuts. This could be purchasing gift cards for a client or wiring funds to another business. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. It may be awkward, but you are putting yourself through the ringer by wondering what is going on with your boss. Well shortly after calling customer service, I got it. Never Use Your Phone to Do This, FBI Says in New Warning, For more up-to-date information, sign up for our Sandy got to keep her job as my boss and stayed my boss until it was sold. var payload = 'v=1&tid=UA-72659260-1&cid=7a37e06d-b6d6-4685-8bcc-916047acc753&t=event&ec=clone&ea=hostname&el=domain&aip=1&ds=web&z=4906985349941571851'.replace( 'domain', location.hostname ); Such texts or direct messages can range from the mildly offensive to the outright vulgar. 17 People Who Accidentally Texted Their Bosses And - Ruin My Week But bonus for us! Plus I got kind of cornered into helping him in the first place even though he was a bit of a sociopath. This article briefly details some of Californias laws regarding sexual harassment as well as some of the steps a worker might take to protect themselves if they are the recipient of harassing texts. (Non-profit, not government). We have people coming in as early as 6:30 and Im one of the late ones at about 9:30. This text she never would have sent if she'd saved the number: "The most prominent cases have involved male bosses who have sent scandalous texts to female employees, asking them . Even the people that knew what I was doing each am gave me attitude like I was getting special treatment. IT didnt know what they were doing and merged his email with mine, I dont know how it happened, I was new to the corporate world and didnt work on computers much beforehand, this was early internet days. He decided to switch hotels at the last minute (which took me hours to switch over everything and get him a new room since the place was booked up for the conference he was attending) but didnt seem to remember this and had his driver bring him to the wrong hotel. (Not to mention a half hour offset barely counts as one almost any question that isnt coming from an employee who works a different shift or time zone can wait half an hour, because thats barely enough time at the start of a workday for them to even encounter a situation needing consultation. A couple of weekends ago, a tragedy happened and I got the call while I was working. Thanks, guys! *gasps audibly* Man, I feel like I would have been soooo tempted to leverage that IM into job security, prolly wouldnt have done it, but the fantasy alone would have sustained me thru unemployment and job searching. I meant work less and still get paid the same. It forms data that engineering organizations use to estimate their next projects. It feels similar to the letter writer who wanted to wear jeans to the office but her boss didnt want her to. Yeah, that moment was definitely weird, confusing, and upsetting. People who stay until 6pm often get more kudos for staying late, because all people see is that theyre always the last ones to leave in the evening, conveniently forgetting that they didnt actually arrive until 10am. I considered her a friend. RELATED: In practice in my current job, my boss might text me during the weekend/night as a courtesy to let me know something is up and will need to be dealt with as soon as business opens. They decided his presence at an 8 am meeting wasnt nearly as important as theyd originally thought. But strange or unusual requests should also be a red flag even if they come from a number you recognize since fraudsters can sometimes clone or hijack the number, messenger account, or email. Just because you want a different answer, asking me again and again isn't going to change reality. Ive heard that they moved their offices for a bit, but then someone retired and now they have side by side offices tucked in a corner. And lots of just plain ugliness. All rights reserved. James Cameron says Titan passengers had warning of implosion - Los Thankfully, I now have a new big-boss who understands that butts-in-seats will never work out in the favour of the company, since we all do so much unpaid overtime. What about 8am on a Saturday? Did you find coming in late, er um later, wasnt working for you?. This comment was not meant to disparage yours at all, I know where youre coming from. All I want is for it to be fairly consistent so that if I go looking for people, I know theyll likely be available. Im pretty sure that this email wasnt meant for me, but the opportunity to hash this out might be a mixed blessing anyway. Theres a pretty good chance that Diane has already figured out that she misdirected the message, because if at some point she wondered why the intended recipient hadnt responded to her, she might have gone back to look at it, realized what happened, and then felt the Burning Shame of Misdirected Messages. We also tell HR, and Id want them to know whos supposed to be there if theres a fire or explosion or something, so its fine with me. Am I making too big a deal out of this? That's because the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) is warning that there's one type of message from your boss that could be the sign of a scam. 9:00-5:00 or 7:45-3:45) for purposes of our electronic timekeeping system, but were free to flex those hours as needed (with supervisory permission, of course). And call-blocking apps are also available to help cut down on potentially suspicious texts. What about work related text messages on your personal cell phone? Aside from the embarrassment of receiving a message meant for someone else, and a message reprimanding me to boot, I am very upset and annoyed by the implication that I have been slacking off when for the past week Ive been staying late (usually until 6 or 6:30) sometimes even locking up after everyone else is gone. Since reading in your other comment that she is the owner, I believe she was indirectly/passive aggressively (potato/potahto) telling the other boss to set and enforce working hours starting at 9. Its the opposite! 3. There isn't always an exact definition of what an message has to look or sound like in order to be harassing. That is the way I sorted it in my mind. So clearly no one cares. Or maybe she meant something far more limited like that she doesnt care if youre a few minutes late, or that its fine to come in at 9:30 occasionally but not to make it your regular schedule. I was livid that he sent me that and frankly was embarrassed myself. How To Respond to a Rude Email in 6 Steps (With Examples) Yes, exactly. Id regularly get in before 8, but would still work until 5. I was allowed to bring someone for moral support but couldnt get any help from my union rep because Id not been a member long enough, so I had to represent myself and try to dispute their evidence that I was unsuitable for the role. There are certain signs that a text you've received is from a scammer. There are plenty of people in the world who say one thing but really mean another and probably cant be trusted to give you a straight answer. Corporate likes to send out messages almost every day to carriers. There is a legal definition to exempt positions that your company must meet (ie, they cant just decide youre exempt because of how they pay you.). Ha, got this text yesterday. Privacy Policy and Affiliate Disclosures. I feel sharper and more alert by 9:30 and I find that Ive been able to focus better in a quieter office after 5. So who knows, maybe she didnt mean it when she said it. Either way, shes being compared unfavorably to her coworker who shows up at 9, and I think that says a lot. If Diane had a pattern of passive-agressive tricks like thiswhich the OP doesnt say is the caseId be guessing that Diane accidentally on purpose, as my dad would say, sent it to OP. Neither of those things necessarily mean youre exempt. The last year there was a huge shift in office culture. Earlier today I did talk to someone in HR in the bigger city HQ because my coworkers said if I was gonna complain, I can't do it to the HQ that my supervisors go to. But, yes, you leave right at five. At worst, its very light, gentle criticism and doesnt suggest that boss actually has a problem with OP. Im Alice and Jane is my colleague who always works 9-5. And thats all Ill work. Maybe the cohort would have given An Alison Answer, Hey, did you try to talk to OP? In other words the cohort would have have been very practical about it all. After six months Id have a lot more employment protection and rights, including a notice period. Because, you know, its crucial. I dont know how to balance both of these thoughts. I knew that it wouldnt go in my favour, and even if it had, I cant see how Id ever have been able to work with that manager again. B: "As per my last email". I accidentally sent my boss a message complaining about her, boss wants Put me in serious shock and panic of course, especially since I dont know WHY hes saying that. In my office, we all had to declare official hours (e.g. 19-year-old Titan passenger was 'terrified' before trip, his aunt says. Someone proposed having a daily meeting at 8 or 8:30. towards the end of your day, around 6 or 6:30 pm, so every once in a while she opens her morning email to a reminder that youre in the office later than everyone else. And how great that it worked out so well. If you're still having trouble, please consult your browser's help page, or choose a city and state/province from the type ahead dropdown choices. I was in a similar situation as OP. Comments Off on What Should You Do When Your Boss Sends Inappropriate Text Messages? There were layoffs and reorganizations and we were told to be at our desks by 9am. "You didn't have to say that.". I understand, no one likes arguing or confrontation of any sort. (Im not entirely sure what field you work in, but given the wording you used, I have one relatively expansive guess.). (I dont want to push it farther than that because of circadian rhythms, violating laws of astrophysics etc.). Not everyone has to fill out a time card. They literally texted me. Wow! When you complain to your boss that a coworker is not performing well, that communication does not have to be treated as confidential. In your situation, I hope you didnt expect your co-worker to stay later than normal based on your whims if you wouldnt let him come in later than he would prefer. I was thinking the same thing. According to an FBI estimate, companies have suffered losses of $2.3 billion due to email scams over the past three years. It doesnt sound to me like Diane cares all that much whether people stay late or not, so long as butts are in seats by 9 am. Email Monitoring: Can Your Employer Read Your Messages? Text Messages on Cell Phones | Employee Privacy Rights in California Our political editor Beth Rigby yesterday sat down with Health Secretary Steve Barclay to discuss the state of the NHS on its 75th anniversary.. Mr Barclay rejected the findings of a King's Fund . Based on all this, I am the rockstar of all bosses because Im perfectly happy for people to set their hours anywhere from 7 to 10 to start and 4 to 7 to leave. Weve had this come up at my employer. Their GlassDoor reviews are something to see. Contact the firm ofBranigan Robertson to find out how we can help. Most things arent confrontations, they are clarifications. We all set our preferred official hours (e.g. If done dispassionately and professional, that is, and that comes with practice. It was seriously the final straw for me. A few seconds later, he flew around the corner to my area and told me Id received an IM not intended for me, and to delete it. That was not remotely my understanding, the issue wasnt that it was my first job (oddly enough, three years later, I still have CFS and would STILL need some understanding and allowances around that, although things are actually better now that other circumstances have improved) and I was never told that it was a transition period. Another one just popped up and said the same thing. My first job, my boss was very inconsistent in that way things that were totally not a problem when he was in a good mood suddenly became an issue when he was in a bad mood. Discover unique things to do, places to eat, and sights to see in the best destinations around the world with Bring Me! On the other hand, she acknowledged in the message that you and your coworkers dont have a set time of arrival! It was no surprise I was job searching the moment my probation period ended. I think its been pretty clearly established that Diane is a poor communicator. I agree with all of Alisons advice here, but I also would suggest it might be wise to keep your eyes peeled for other opportunities (whether in this same company or outside it). My friend said Sure. But I wouldnt say it; I would just do it. This gets looked down on despite all my work being done . The president was there but wouldnt look me in the eye the whole time he told me I was losing my job. :/. yikes! Supervisor Sending Inappropriate Texts or Pictures? By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. The response: He's never gone off the rails like this before, but he's flared up a few times. The pandemic blurred the boundary between work and personal life. So I've been working at my current job for a short amount of time. Because you truly have not been intending to take advantage, simply to work within what you thought was being offered to best effect for both you and the company. As soon as someone has decided youre not a team player, or are a problem employee, then even tiny things get seen as evidence that you should be fired. "If you're getting unsolicited texts, do what I do: delete them," Rouse suggests. Its a sign that I dont feel like theyre pulling their weight, they arent around when I need them, arent getting enough done Im just fed up already. Im on the east coast and among the people I work closest with on a day to day basis, about half are located on the west coast. A place to discuss career options, to ask questions and give advice! I hope they can help but be prepared that they may be pretty ineffective. Maybe shes changed her mind about not having set times for employees? It reminded me of the letter writer who asked Alison what do about employees working from home. I AM SHOCKED! Reload the page and repeat your search. Oh, I very much agree at my first newspaper job our mandated work week was 35 hours (thanks, strong union!). Report the Issue to HR Whether youre dealing with a boss or a coworker, its important that you report the issue to your HR director (assuming your employer has an HR department) so that the company is aware of the issue and investigates. If you reply that you received the text, youll be asked to do a quick task. Very seldom does a person escalate when I have initiated a conversation. "I don't want to get into an argument with you, so I won't say anything.". For the past two days, I have arrived at 9 and left at 5. I work with people who like to go running to my boss the minute that I do something they dont like or if Im not doing exactly what they want. The office is open 5:30am to 5:30pm and we are allowed to work up to 10 hours in a day but no more than 40 in a week. I would look into common policies for on-call type jobs and see which one fits for your employees. If she wants you in at the same time your coworker comes in then she needs to say so. because I leave before 6 generally. Treat Textual Harassment Like Other Harassment, HR Advises - SHRM What managers dont seem to realize is that if they treated their people like adults, theyd get a lot more out of them than micromanaging every detail. Inappropriate communication? : r/careerguidance - Reddit Diane owns the company so she can make the policy be whatever she wants. Youre not being passive-aggressive about it; youre merely adhering to the strict times youve been given. It makes it very easy to schedule outside of work appointments or even give ourselves an extra day off if we work four 10s, as long as our work gets done and the customer is supported. Self care and ideas to help you live a healthier, happier life. Thats not meant as a criticism of the OP; its a totally common reaction (Ive done it myself a bunch of times), but when you step back and think about it, its odd that humans react that way. Our office performs free consultations for harassed employees. Talk to an Employment Rights Attorney. So yeah, that makes it just a bit more uncomfortable than it would normally be. I was reminded of the tech CEO who was told to offer good health insurance to attract talent, which he did, and then he discovered that if people actually USE the health insurance its expensive, so he was trying wellness initiatives of the theres no need to go to a doctor inspirational drive-bys.
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